red skirt?

red skirt? by bfreemercy featuring a wool skirt

STEFFEN SCHRAUT slim shirt
$175 - stylebop.com

Burberry double breasted coat
£695 - net-a-porter.com

Moschino wool skirt
£614 - farfetch.com

Fogal tight
$69 - barneys.com

Manolo Blahnik pointy heels
£469 - farfetch.com

Eyeful fringe scarve
$44 - nordstrom.com

Black hair accessory
£1.99 - attitudeclothing.co.uk

Back to basics

Every time I start a new journal God does  something new on the inside of me, He gives me a word for that which I will be going through, and i normally read into it, while trying to convince myself that I am not reading into it because it never turns out the way that I think it will. I am not sure if I can call this a new season in my life, but perhaps the next chapter in the journey of 'intimacy' with Him. 

I have been seeing myself in a different light lately. I really do not have everything as together as I would like to think. In taking stock of where I am in my life, how I behave, how I spend my time, I find myself incredibly lacking. Not in a condemning way, but in a healthy-convicting sort of way. I have been seeking God on this, these tendencies draw me away from Him, and I don't like it. I don't like being removed from Him. I want to experience a life with Him unlike any other. I want to meet, even exceed the biblical basis of what a Christian should be; heal the sick, raise the dead etcetera etcetera. How can I do these things when I am so distracted by life? If I want to be really honest, how can I do these things when my own mind and perceptions hold me back the way they do? And what do I do now that I realize I have this issue? Thankfully, God never leaves me alone to deal with this stuff. After an all-out-there cry session the other night He has told me this next journey will be about going back to the basics; going back to where the foundations have been built, reestablishing correct views and perceptions of Him, myself, and life in general. He has been leading me to go back through my past, to the things that I have been through, and go through them with Him. I dislike this thoroughly. I don't like digging up the past, it happened, I got through it, the end. But it's not the end, at least not for me. It still hurts. There are many things that I just do not understand, and would prefer not to think about; but I cannot run from this anymore. I have an extreme influx of time in my life right now, nothing to distract me from what is going on inside of me. So it is time to write it all out; write out my testimony and go through every bit of pain that still resides there. I am looking forward to it, and not. I don't like emotional pain, I feel it in my heart. It physically hurts me, but I suppose I could say I am looking forward to being done with this. To not having to deal with this stuff anymore; also every bit of work that has been difficult up to this point has been extremely worth it, the sacrifice minimal in comparison to what I have received.  Besides, who wants to carry around all that baggage? And so I begin today, writing out as He points to things in my heart. Pray for me :)

Tomorrow's outfit.

Tomorrow's outfit. by bfreemercy featuring a white day dress

Antik Batik white day dress
€127 - maryandpaul.com

Burberry double breasted coat
$1,470 - stylebop.com

H&M zipper jeans
£30 - hm.com

Deerskin boots
$190 - topshop.com

London Road pearl jewelry
£85 - johnlewis.com

Scout Catalogue tie dye scarve
$118 - needsupply.com

Fried chicken, gluten free style

I like fried food, a lot. Chicken being one of my favorite, breaded, crispy, fried, deliciousness. Especially the breading, love the breading. Considering that wheat causes poor reactions in my body, I have been abstaining from this amazing concoction. So I decided to make my own recipe. The result was the juiciest, most amazing chicken I have ever eaten. I do so love happy endings to my recipe experiments!

Fried Chicken, gluten free style

Chicken pieces

Buttermilk, (I used half and half with vinegar)

2/3 C rice flour

1/3 C tapioca flour

1T Garlic powder

2tsp Cayenne pepper

salt and pepper to taste

Oil for frying

Cut up the chicken breasts, soak them in the buttermilk, I put seasoning in the milk too, garlic, salt, pepper. And let it rest for an hourish.

Mix the dry ingredients. Coat the chicken in mixture. Put the coated pieces in the oil.

Fry till golden brown. Wait to eat until generally cool so you don't burn your mouth off.

Apple cheddar galette

I bought a caramel apple from the store yesterday, while I like apples, I like caramel more. So after eating, I found myself with a leftover granny smith... so I decided pie sounded good, but I have not been feeling well for the past few days, so as I rolled out the crust I made earlier today (leftover from the pie I made at work today), I found that I didn't have the desire to actually do the work of constructing a pie crust. Easy, lazy-day answer? A galette! Defined as a 'casual form of pie where the crust is folded over the contents, usually fruits, with the center left open. It is baked on a flat baking sheet instead of in a pie plate.' I like to call it lazy pie. Or just simple, awesome food. I love apples and cheese so I like to include it in my pie. (Apple pie with cheddar cheese crust = amazing!). It also prevents the crust from getting soggy on the bottom. So here it is! 

Apple Cheddar Galette

One pie crust

Shredded cheddar cheese, (approx. 1/2 C)

One - two apples, sliced and diced

(I used one granny smith, and one golden delicious)

1/4 C brown sugar

Juice and zest from a one half of a lime or lemon

one tablespoon of butter

two teaspoons of cornstarch

Roll out the pie dough in a circular fashion. Top with the cheese. 

Move on to the apples, I peeled and diced them, I like to slice them uniformly so that they bake at the same rate. Put them in a bowl with the citrus and brown sugar. Allow them to macerate for several minutes, until you have a nice juice.


 
Drain the juice into a sauce pan, putting the apples on top of the cheese-y pie crust. 








Boil the juice until it is a caramel, add the butter and melt it into the caramel.  

  
Pour the caramel over the apple-crust mixture.

Fold the crust over on itself, encasing the apples inside:

Bake the pastry for 20-30 minutes at 400 degrees. Top with some vanilla ice cream and more caramel, Bon Appetit!

Today in the kitchen: homemade corned beef hash

I hate corned beef. Seriously. I am texturally sensitive, so slimy boiled beef is not appetizing to me at all. So when i bought a corned beef yesterday it was my intention to make the most amazing breakfast in the world, corned beef hash. (As it turns out, I can avoid this awful texture by boiling it for the first hour and a half, and then finishing it by roasting it in the oven with the vegetables and potatoes. Seriously delicious, and who doesn't prefer roasted veggies over boiled mushy grossness?). As I did two different preparations if the beef, I will go ahead and do both here. Enjoy!

Corned beef
1 small corned beef, preseasoned ( I think mine was 1.5 lbs). Now, I bought this with the intention of only making the hash, if you want to eat this as a meal and use the leftovers for hash, you will need a bigger one.

3 medium sized red potatoes
1/2 onion
1 c mini carrots
1/3 cabbage

Put the beef in a saucepan, cover it with water, put in included seasoning packet, (should be with the beef). Bring the water to a boil, turn down to a simmer. Cook for 1-1.5 hours depending on size of the roast. Internal temp should be 160 degrees. Take the beef out, put in a roasting pan with cut up veggies, bake 15-30min till veggies are done.


Corned beef hash

This is for a single serving

1/3 c chopped beef
3 mini carrots
1/2 red potato
1/3 cup chopped cabbage
1-2 T butter
Sprinkle of garlic powder
Salt and pepper to taste








When I made the beef the night before, I didn't roast the cabbage, because I forgot to buy it. So this morning I just chopped the stuff raw and fried it in butter. Mmm, butter...

Okay, chop up the ingredients, I would fry the potatoes up a little bit before putting the rest of the veggies in, because I like them more crunchy and squishy.







I then put all the rest of the ingredients in the melted butter, fried it up. Put it on a plate, then I fried up an egg over medium, and put it on top. Couple that with a cup of my new favorite honey-almond latte, and you have got breakfast perfection my friend.

Today's kitchen adventure: fudge brownies

Today is one of those "meh" kind of days. They do happen for me occasionally, normally one day out of the month, around the same time as with most women... any way, today is that day for me. I normally hole myself away for the evening, not wanting to have a bad attitude, or possibly take it out on anyone else. But today, I wanted to cook, so I did. A lot. Mexican chicken soup for dinner, Corned beef for a later dish, starting a homemade chicken stock, and finally, for dessert, fudge brownies. Now, being wheat free, brownies are harder to come by. I ran across this recipe the other day utilizing black beans for the base. I am a brave sort, and I like to experiment, so after some tweaking I came up with this recipe and it turned out amazingly well. They were fudgy, moist, little bits of amazingness in the mouth.  Everyone who tried them were incredibly surprised they were made from beans, really. My mother is adverse to anything healthy. She ate them without knowing what they were made of, after eating several she found out what the base ingredient was, had a little fit, then continued asking for more. I am serious, best little brownie bites I have ever eaten, and they are good for you!


Fudge Brownies 


1 16 oz can black beans, drained, rinsed well
3 eggs, (I used 6 T egg whites + one whole egg)
2 T honey
1 T brown sugar
1/2 C sugar or sugar substitute (my mom's low carbing it)
1/2 C cocoa
1 t vanilla
1/2 t baking powder
pinch of salt
1/4 c - 1/2 c chocolate chips if desired, I used about 1/3 c white chocolate chips
optional: toasted coconut for the top.

Heat oven to 350. Blend ingredients, sans the chocolate chips. Blend till well combined.







You could put this in an 8x8 baking pan, i used mini-muffins, (portion control FTW :D).







Bake the pan for 30-35 min. Cupcake tins for 15-20 minutes, test them at 15 min with a toothpick. I suggest using cupcake liners, and greasing them, (the first batch stuck to the pan, even with greasing, and resulted in ugly brownies that tasted delicious :)

Todays hair how to: French braided side chignon

I have been inspired lately to look cute. This probably related to my new fascination with Pinterest, which is now my most favorite website ever. I find inspiration for outfits, and am now to the point where I find it difficult to pick out my outfits without first looking at my list of 'fashionista' outfits I have saved. Another area I find myself dabbling in is hairstyle. I love my hair. Truly. It is thick, very thick, holds a style really well, and naturally curly, wavy if I brush it out... Any way, I am a big fan of pretty hair styles, and today's was inspired by my attempt to find something cute to wear with my hat that wouldn't be hidden under it.

1. I started this morning out with a dry shampoo on my bangs-crown area of my head. Decreases greasy bang days. This stuff is awesome. I used Suave because I don't like spending $18 on something that works just as well as the $4 bottle. Kudos to Suave for keeping it real, and delivering in their products :)

2. Begin by starting a french braid in the temple/side burn area of a side of your head, (pick one, I can't do everything for you :D)

3. Braid around your head in the back, following the hair line, till you get to the opposite side of your head, but still in the back of the head. Pin it with a bobby pin for safe keeping.

4. Take large strands of hair wrapping it around the base where you initially pinned. Pinning each strand into place. (my thick head 'o hair took about 5 different strands)

I like mine messy, so that's how I kept it, I am sure you can do something smooth and lovely if you so desire. Place hat atop, or keep as is, and you are set to face the day, lovely as ever :)

Today in the kitchen: homemade Lara type bars

I am not a breakfast person. Don't get me wrong, I love breakfast foods, and eat them any time of the day, I just don't like to eat in the morning. I know, I know, science and research says we should eat in the morning to get our metabolisms going, to feel more refreshed, blah di blah di blah. I don't like the rules of eating, the annoy me. I am well accustomed to them, being a nurse I had to study nutrition, and what ever I didn't learn there, I found on my own time poring over articles of health and fitness. I don't like to eat when I am not hungry, and therefore, I don't. On an average day I get hungry at about 10am, which is not really conducive to the whole 'breakfast of champions' thought, as I am chasing around a four year old trying to get her to put some clothes on. I used to be able to hold myself over with a piece of fruit, but it doesn't cut it anymore, I get hungry about 40 minutes later. I started implementing these little meal bars into my dietary line up, but as a frugal individual I shudder at paying $1.50-$2 for a food bar. So tapping into my inner chef I made some instead, the first bars are the 'cashew cookie' standby. It's a good for you breakfast/snack bar. The variation recipe I am going to include is AMAZING. seriously. I was licking the food processor blade making sure to get every last remnant of this stuff. I don't really have a bar I made them after, just a concoction from my noggin of ingredients I love, so I will call them toasted coconut double chocolate bars. Enjoy!

Cashew cookie:

1/4 c dates
1/4 c raisins
1/3 c cashews
Sprinkle of cinnamon

Seriously, that's it. Run it through the food processor till you have a meal consistency, press into a small dish, or make into balls.




I stick them in the freezer to harden them, then wrap 'em up. Makes about 2 regular sized bars, I am a small eater, so I make them into four mini bars, and I am good with one.


Variation:

Toasted coconut double chocolate bars

(slap your grandma good)

1/4 c raisins
1/3 c dates
1/4 c toasted coconut
1/2 c toasted nuts (I used half almonds, half pecans)
2 T cocoa
A few drops of almond extract (this makes them awesome, don't leave it out!)
1/4 white chocolate chips


Put all ingredients sans the extract and chips. Process till you get the meal, add the extract and white chocolate, process a bit more, press into a larger dish. Freeze. Don't cut your tongue licking the blade....

Today in the kitchen: 'raw' cookie dough

Food and I have an interesting relationship; After a multiple year battle with an eating disorder we have finally come to an understanding: food nourishes my body and tastes good, while I no longer hate it, and appreciate it for all of it's excellent qualities. (more on the whole 'ED' aspect of life at some other time i am sure). I truly enjoy cooking/baking and experimenting in the kitchen. I am one of those 'fly by the seat of my pants' type of cooks (read: not a measurer-type). It is a freeing feeling, but can be frustrating, especially in the remaking process, or for those who ask for my recipes. That being said, I am attempting to rectify this part of myself and take note of what I am actually doing.

Lately I have been experimenting in the wheat/refined sugar free area of the kitchen, making delectable treats (sounds better than 'I have a wheat allergy/sugar sensitivity', doesn't it? :D). Today's result was a 'cookie dough' that is good for you (good as in natural, wheat-free, refined sugar-free, not low-fat, low-calorie. In my opinion that's not healthy, it's cardboard. And junk... Okay, off my soapbox now :)

'raw' cookie dough



1/2c almonds
1/2c pecans
2/3c oats
1/4c ish coconut
1/4t salt
1/2t cinnamon
1t vanilla

I ran this through the food processor till combined and resembling a meal:

2-4T honey (sorry, didn't measure, just add as processor is going and the 'dough' starts to stick together when pinched).

1/4-1/2c chocolate chips/ carob nibs
Extra nuts (I like 'em chunky)
Process till mixed

Pack 1T of dough and roll into a ball, makes about 18, I had enough for that, and a bit for the little one to play with and make her own.

You can utilize any nuts really, I used macadamia for the 'chunk' aspect.

Happy baking! Well, I didn't actually bake here...eh. Happy cookie making!